You know you're EASTERN EUROPEAN when.....

(sursa: de pe grupul ononim din Facebook)

1. Your neighbour comes over every day uninvited, for coffee.

2. You start your day with a cup of coffee and a cigarette

3.You are standing next to the two largest suitcases at the airport.

4.You arrive one or two hours late to a party - and think its normal.

5.All your children have nick names, which sound nowhere close to their real names.

6.You know someone with 20 kids

7.You talk for an hour at the front door when leaving someone's house.

8.You have lace curtains.

9.You have lace tablecloths.

10.You have rugs covering every inch of your house.

11.Your mom tells you you're too skinny even though your 30 pounds overweight.

12.You have curtains hanging across every doorway.

13.You know someone that married his girlfriend of 2 months.

14.Your house is full of medicine from your old country and it’s probably all illegal here.

15.You and your friends have ever been kicked out of a restaurant or recreational park for being too loud or rowdy.

16.You dont know how to use a dishwasher b/c u are the dishwasher.

17.You have a vinyl tablecloth on your kitchen table.

18.You use grocery bags to hold garbage.

19.Your dad ever butchered a pig or lamb.

20.Your mom ever chased you with a rolling pin or a broom telling you to stop so that she could hit you.

21.You're twenty years old and your parents are trying to send you back to your country to get you married cause your old.

22.Getting married at 18 is normal.

23.Getting married at 16 actually happens.

24.You don't use measuring cups when cooking.

25.If you don't live at home, when your parents call, they ask if you've eaten, even if it's midnight.

26.When your parents meet strangers and talk for a few minutes, you discover you're talking to a distant cousin.

27.Your parents don't realize phone connections to foreign countries have improved in the last two decades, and still scream at the top of their lungs when making foreign calls.

28. It's "normal" if your wedding has 600 people.

29.You dont know half the people at your wedding cuz your parents invited them.

30.Your family owns a coffee grinder..and a nut grinder

31.Your 15 year old sister can out-drink any American guy.

32.You work out six days a week, but somehow you dad whoops your ass in like five seconds after he comes home from a thirteen hour day from the bakery / factory / food business.

33.You own a leather jacket.

34.You drive a nicer car than your parents.

35.Your dad carries around enough money to buy a car.

36.You have all brand new appliances in your kitchen but your mom cooks in the basement with the stove from your old house.

37.You are prohibited from speaking English in you own home.

38.Your parents have gone on vacation ONCE and it was to your home country.

39.Your church has a fully loaded bar

40.If you are a girl and not married by the age of 20 you are an old maid

41.You base your whole life on the fortune in your coffee cup

42.The head of a pig with an apple in its mouth is looked upon as a delicacy

43.Your parents still prefer to buy cassettes instead of CDs.

44.Your friends' parents talk to you like they're YOUR PARENTS too.

45.You are adored the first 10 years of your life, then treated like a complete idiot until you get married.

46.Your car costs more than your college education

47.You drive a Honda (or, in the EXTREME worse case a Nissan), and your windows are tinted to twice the legal limit

48.Your parents have computer "experience" for 8 years already on the resume, yet they been in US for only 4...

49.You’re actually nodding and laughing at most of these things

50.You’re a proud Eastern European and pass this on to your European friends..

51.There are no vegetarians in your family because they have all died off

52.You have been able to buy cigarettes or alcohol for family members as early as age 7.

53. Even better you‘re 6 and your father sends you out to buy him cigaretts and beer.

54. You have 17 consonants and 2 vowels in your last name.

55.Your parents tell you that they walked to school in 7feet of snow with no shoes on.

56. A loaf of bread is eaten for lunch every day.

57. you take your shoes off when you enter the house, and every
family member has his/her own slippers (plus some extra for the guests)

58. your mother tells you not to sit close to TV, and not to use
cell phones, because you‘ll get a brain tumor.

59. You had to share a room until you were 21.

60. your mother tells you not to sit on the concrete slabs, or your balls/ovaries are going to freeze.

61. your mother threatens you with "oh, just wait til ur father gets home".

62. You begin and end most sentences with a curse word.

63. Your father refers to all politicians as "scum" and "criminals".

64. You know how to party with the family.

65. You're the only one in the room laughing, because you know all this is true!

RMGC - platim cianura si muntii rasi!

Nu inghititi gogoneaua de la Rosia Montana Gold Corporation!

Ia priviti cum Bogdan Naumovici nu se lasa.... laser frate!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YJ0oc2t5nZU

Stinge lumina

Daca urasc Orgoreynul?

" - Daca urasc Orgoreynul? Nu, de ce-as face-o? Cum poti sa urasti o tara si sa iubesti alta? Tibe vorbeste despre asemenea lucruri, eu n-am abilitatea lui. Eu cunosc oameni, orase, ferme, dealuri, rauri, stanci. Stiu cum toamna, razele amurgului scalda un luminis pe o colina. Dar ce rost are sa inconjuri toate aceste lucruri cu o granita, sa le dai un nume si sa te opresti cu iubirea acolo unde numele inceteaza? Daca iti iubesti tara inseamna sa urasti ne-tara? Atunci nu-i bine. E o simpla iubire de sine? Asta-i bine, dar nu trebuie sa faci din ea o virtute sau o profesiune... Asa cum iubesc viata, iubesc si dealurile domeniului Estre, insa genul acesta de iubire nu are o frontiera a urii. Iar dincolo de asa ceva sunt ignorant, sper .."

Ursula K. LeGuin "Mana stanga a intunericului"

Evlaviometru

Ladies and gentlemen,
Animals of all ages,

O carte interesanta, care vorba lui Julian Barnes "should be read from atheist to monk" este The GOD Delusion de Richard Dawkins.

Pentru cei interesati, iata un copy/paste al unei grile de masurare a credintei / necredintei. Macro si sociologic vorbind, eu as paria pe Romania agnostica (nivelul 3).

Nivelul 1
Teism puternic. 100% probabilitate a existentei lui Dumnezeu. Vorba lui C.G. Jung "Eu nu cred, eu stiu"

Nivelul 2
Probabilitate mare insa mai putin de 100%. De facto teist. "Nu pot avea maxima certitudine, dar cred cu tarie in Dumnezeu si imi traiesc viata pe premiza ca el exista"

Nivelul 3
Mai mare decat 50 % probabilitate insa nu cu mult peste aceasta cifra. Agnostic inclinand spre teism. "Sunt destul de nesigur insa prefer sa cred ca totusi exista"

Nivelul 4
Exact 50 %. Agnostic impartial. "Existenta sau non-existenta lui Dumnezeu este echiprobabila"

Nivelul 5
Mai putin de 50% insa nu cu mult sub aceasta cifra. Agnostic inclinand spre ateism. "Nu stiu daca exista Dumnezeu si sunt mai degraba sceptic in acesta privinta"

Nivelul 6
Probabilitate mica dar mai mult decat zero. De facto ateist. "Nu pot stii cu certitudine, dar cred ca existenta lui Dumnezeu este improbabila si imi traiesc viata pe premiza ca el nu exista"

Nivelul 7
Ateism puternic. "Stiu ca Dumnezeu nu exista si cu aceasta convingere a lui Jung, pot spune ca stiu ca nu exista"

BODD 4 - Desteapta-te sau detesta-te romane!

Battle Off da Dome ieri seara in Suburbia cu amicul Solo. Foarte kultural si instructiv pentru cine n-a mai vazut asa ceva, mai putin pentru oamenii cu pudori verbale. Deci "Du-te ba"-ul Guerillei este valabil pentru finala BODD care, daca nu insel, va fi pe 7 decembrie.

Mi-au placut:
Kremlin - pentru inspiratie, rimedebine, ingeniozitate mentala
Pascal - pentru umor, ebrietate pozitiva si singurul care a avut curajul sa fie auto-ironic
Genial a fost freestyle-ul produs de cei 2 la final, infratirea moldo-ierbicola la maxim.


Au potential dar au "ars-o" in vulgaritati, la inceput gustate mai apoi huiduite:
Pytt - omul talentat dar cu un sictir care l-a si scos de pe scena
IBU - tot talentat insa prea incrancenat, incrancenat, incrancenat

Deasupra tuturor a fost juriul in special Dox, Rimaru si Stoe Toxxic, care desi la un moment dat, se uitau cu intelegere parinteasca asupra prostiilor debitate, au intervenit sa le reaminteasca copiilor ca scopul nu e sa se besteleasca, injure dibaci sau sa le pulseze inutil vena la tampla. Este miza, e adrenalina dar nu e cazul de transformat scena in latrina.

Remember cine sunt cantaretii de rap..

R.A.C.L.A forever!

Concurs, tzoagla si strut

Concurs
http://www.naturalist.ro
- multumesc frumos juriului

Bicla sau tzoagla
de la http://www.lowriders.ro/

Strutz la gratar
tot de la baietii de la http://www.lowriders.ro/ ; multam fain - super treat!

si cu care ne vedem pe 30 seara la Battle Off Da Dome

The magic word is Rock'n Roll, man!